In this generation, most children grow up too fast, usually starting at the age of twelve. However, it was not the way that I was forced to. I know personally that my mom leaving for a month extremely impacted my life, in part both in a good way and a not so good way. The fact that I let this episode change me I see more as a failure. Not that I am disappointed at how I turned out after all of it, but I think sometimes I am more worried than I should be about everything, and it is possible that this had to do with this experience. In addition, once my mom came back, she always seemed to be mad at me because I would act like the mom without meaning too and she wanted everything to be like she never left. This impacted our relationship drastically for years, until last year. I wish I had been closer to my mom through those years, and I wish that I could be a bit less worried about everything. Between the ages of twelve and fourteen I was consumed by this new me. Now I'm able to be more fun-loving, which I am really happy about. Overall through this look at adulthood I became mature and responsible, but I think I could have lived out a few more years in childhood. Then high school happened...
It's too bad that you had such a rough relationship with your mom. I had a phase where I was basically in a constant fight with my parents and it was awful.
ReplyDeleteI love your focus on not growing up too fast, I try to live like this but sometimes I find it difficult to do such. Sometimes failure helps us to find a new self and this happened to you.
ReplyDeleteThis is so tough to read and I have no idea what to say honestly, other than that you're an amazingly strong person and I never realized how much you'd been through in your life. I have so much respect for you, I did before too but I'm just in awe of your courage and power
ReplyDeleteI'm sure most teenagers could look back and say they could have lived childhood a few more years, you're not alone. I'm sure you got some maturity out of this horrible experience, and I see that in you. You're a wonderful person, and its never too late to act like a child!
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DeleteThank you guys :) and Ben, I know, it is difficult sometimes. Jayne, your comment made my day, thank you. And Ben Apuzzo,I like that you're mature as well, and I'm sure I'll have a little kid in me until I'm old.
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